Frequently Asked Questions

How can I connect to a mentor?

Our in-hospital parent mentors are caring preemie parents who offer one-on-one or group support on-site in the NICU. Each of our volunteer parent mentors have completed training in parental support as well as hospital protocol. They visit families in the NICU once weekly or by request. All information is kept strictly confidential. Please let your nurse, social worker or physician know if you would like to meet with a TTMF parent mentor or call our office at 203-202-9714.

How can I receive financial assistance?

To apply for financial assistance, please talk to the social worker at your NICU in one of our partner hospitals: Norwalk, Danbury, Stamford, Bridgeport, St. Vincent’s Medical Center, and Yale New Haven Children’s Hospital. All applications must go thru the social workers at the hospital. We do not currently provide financial assistance to families outside the Fairfield and New Haven County communities.

Are there ways to connect with other preemie families in our community?

Yes! We have lots of ways in which you can stay connected! You can join our mailing list to receive our newsletter with information about local events and opportunities. You can also join the preemie community online by connecting to us on Facebook or Instagram. We also have After the NICU Alumni Gatherings and periodic local activities throughout the Fairfield and New Haven County areas.

Where can I find good resources and information about my preemie?

Find our list of specialized resources click here.

How can my students or scout troop get involved?

The Tiny Miracles Foundation can always use student volunteer hands to help support families of premature babies in Fairfield and New Haven Counties. If and when, you would like to devote some volunteer hours to TTMF, just sign up for our volunteer mailing list or give us a call at 203-202-9714 to get started! All volunteer hours will be documented by a letter from our office!

What is my donation used for?

The Tiny Miracles Foundation has numerous programs designed to support families who have had a premature baby. Our programs include our innovative and highly successful peer to peer mentoring, which we offer in 6 area hospitals; our Financial Assistance Program; our Tiny Treasures program which provides welcome and home care bags to families with babies in the NICU; our isolette cover “Blankets for Preemies” program; resource rooms and lending libraries in each of our area hospitals; bereavement support (both in partner hospitals and beyond); and virtual mentoring for those not in our partner hospitals. Your donations are vital for maintaining these critical supports for the families we serve.

Are there any resources available for post-partum depression or anxiety?

Yes! Premature birth and traumatic delivery are two potential triggers for postpartum anxiety and depression. Otherwise known as Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorders (PMADS), because they can start during or after pregnancy, PMADs are very treatable. One of the best resources, when you are struggling with depression or anxiety after the birth or loss of your preemie, is to know that you are not alone. That’s why our peer to peer mentoring is so critically important. Research has validated the efficacy of peer to peer mentoring in the NICU as a means of reducing PMADs for preemie parents.

If you are struggling, please reach out! We can connect you with a mentor as well as local resources, including support groups, therapists and more. Our Director of Family Services, Kristen Ezzo, can be reached at (203) 202-9714 or kezzo@ttmf.org.

Other resources include:

The National Maternal Mental Health Hotline ( 1-833-TLC-Mama) 1-833-852-6262

Post Partum Support International Helpline 1-800-944-4773

How can I support a family that has a preemie?

Great question! Every family’s needs are different and depend on a wide variety of factors. What’s more, a family’s needs can change moment to moment based on the health of the baby, the recovery of the mom, and more. And many preemie parents don’t even know what they need from one moment to the next.

So…where does that leave you?

Ask the parents if they would like to talk and share about what they are going thru before barraging them with questions. Many parents have to retell this information frequently and it can be overwhelming. Often, parents simply need someone to talk about the weather or what they want for dinner instead of reviewing their child’s medical chart once again. However, some parents will welcome the opportunity to talk about these details; what’s most important is to ASK first.
Activities of Daily Living (ADLs). These are really hard for NICU families. If you have a preemie in the NICU or at home, activities like going to the grocery store, picking up medicine, making dinner and paying bills – these can be time-consuming and difficult. Offer to help with these ADLs so that the parents can spend more time with their Tiny Miracle.
If visiting, be extremely attentive to germs. Don’t even think of stopping by if you have a cough or a runny nose and be very cautious about washing hands (30 seconds at least!) and taking off shoes when you are in the home. Parents may have trouble setting boundaries like this, especially with family members, but the safety of their preemie is paramount and they will be grateful to you for putting the well being of their preemie first and foremost.
What to say/not say

Dos: Listen. Be willing to sit in silence. Tell the parents they are not alone. Tell them that you are there for them no matter what. Allow them to talk about their feelings without judgement. Make it safe for them to share all that they are going thru. Remember that a preemie’s condition can change quickly and that this creates a major roller coaster ride for the parents. That’s normal and okay. Do encourage them to advocate for themselves and their babies.
Don’ts: Don’t have all the answers. Don’t tell the parents that at least they get to sleep thru the night while their baby is in the NICU (they rarely do). Don’t’ say it could be worse. Watching your baby struggle is the hardest thing any parent can imagine. Don’t try to say something insightful to make the parents feel better (most things just come out wrong): just listen and hear them as they talk.

How can I support a family that is bereaved?

Grief is deeply individual. Every person and couple manages loss differently. Supporting and caring for a family that is bereaved presents unique challenges because not only is there no “manual” but many times the family’s needs can fluctuate wildly from day to day.

The most supportive thing you can do for a bereaved family is to listen. Allow the parents and/or children to share what they are feeling in a non-judgmental and open environment. Remind them that they are not alone. Validate that the pain they feel is real, deep and long-lasting and that somehow, one small step by one small step, they will survive. Encourage them to access resources that may help – we have a list of books, websites and local therapists/groups here that we like to share:

Connecting with other families who have gone thru loss can be very healing. If you think a mentoring relationship would be helpful to your loved one who is bereaved, please contact us and let us know. We can connect the family with a mentor who has been thru a similar loss.

Most of all, know that there is no timeline for healing. Loving and supporting families in mourning requires steadfastness and inner strength. So make sure you also get support as you grieve the loss. Find additional information in our After a Loss section of this website.

What can grandparents do to help?

Grandparents are amazing! They can be a great resource for families with preemies. Every family has their own unique dynamics and ways of interacting and the most important thing a grandparent can do is listen to what the preemie mom or dad say they need as they navigate their lives as preemie parents. They may need you to visit the NICU so they can have a day off, or perhaps they just want someone to do their laundry and get some groceries. Some parents welcome company at the hospital where days can be long and overwhelming; others may prefer quiet or could be restricted by hospital visitation policies.

Also, remember that this is happening to you as well. You may need time and space to process what your son/daughter is experiencing as well as to manage the fears and hopes you have as the grandparent to this Tiny Miracle. Find support from others when you can so that you can be as available and present as possible for the parents.

If you are a grandparent and would like to talk to a mentor about your experience, please contact us. We can put you in touch with mentors that can help you process what you are going through and who can brainstorm ways to help as well.

Can you help me find a pediatrician, baby nurse or specialist in my area?

Visit our After the NICU directory which can be searched by town or specialty by clicking here.